joke collection - 02

A couple of Boaj hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground.

He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.
The other Boaj whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
He gasps to the operator, "My friend just collapsed!
I think he's dead! What can I do?"
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says, "Just take it easy.

I can help. First, lets make sure he's dead."
There is a silence, then the operator hears a gunshot...
The Boaj says, "OK, now what?"

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DR. SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed, I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.:
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA:
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.

Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX:
It was a historical inevitability.

RONALD REAGAN:
What chicken?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER:
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook -- and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken.

What do you mean by chicken?

Could you define chicken please?

THE BIBLE:
And God came down from the heavens,
And He said unto the chicken,
"Thou shalt cross the road."
And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS:
Damn, I missed one?
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As is a tale, so is life
not how long it is but how good it is, what matters

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