joke collection – 195

get pregnant, the boss, meet the devil

A couple just started their Lamaze class and they were given an activity requiring the husband to wear a bag of sand - to give him an idea of what it feels like to be pregnant.

The husband stood up and shrugged saying, "This doesn't feel so bad."
The instructor then dropped a pen and asked the husband to pick it up.

• "You want me to pick up the pen as if I were pregnant, the way my wife would do it?" the husband asked.
  
• "Exactly," replied the instructor.
  
• To the delight of the other husbands, he turned to his wife and said,
  "Honey, pick up that pen for me."
  
  
• Kyle and Justin were about to eat with the baby sitter when 6 year old Kyle said, "You can't sit in Daddy's seat!"
  
• "Daddy's not home," the baby sitter replied.
  
• "Since I'm responsible for you while he's gone, I can sit here.
  
• Today I'm the boss."
  Justin, the 4 year old, quickly piped up,"If you're the boss, you sit over there in Mommy's chair!"
  

A woman whose husband often came home drunk decided to cure him of the habit. On Halloween night, she put on a devil suit and hid behind a tree to intercept him on the way home.


When her husband came by, she jumped out and stood before him with her red horns, long tail,and pitchfork.


"Who are you?" he asked, half-drunk.
"I'm the Devil," she responded.
"Well, come on home with me," he said."I married your sister!"
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You can't change the destiny to be what you want


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