joke collection – 98

Mr Patel is buying a TV and asks

• "Do you have colour TVs?"
  
• "Sure." says the assitant.
  
• Mr Patel replys "Give me a green one, please."
  

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Mr Patel calls Air India.

• "How long does it take to fly to Delhi?"
  
• "Just a sec," says the rep.
  
• "Thank you." says Mr Patel and hangs up.
  

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Mr Patel was filling in an application form for a job. He promptly filled the columns titled NAME, AGE, ADDRESS etc. Then he came to the column

• Salary Expected: He was not sure as to what to be filled here.
  
• After much thought he wrote "Yes"!
  

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Mr Patel goes into a store and sees a shiny object. He asks the clerk,

• "What is that shiny object?"
  
• The clerk replies, "That is a thermos."
  
• Mr Patel then asks, "What does it do?"
  
• The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold."
  
• Mr Patel says, "I'll take it!" The next day, he walks into work with his new thermos.
  
• His boss, Mr Patel, sees him and asks, "What is that shiny object you have?"
  
• He said, "It's a thermos."
  
• The boss then asks, "What does it do?"
  
• He replies,"It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
  
• The boss said, "Wow, what do you have in it?"
  
• Mr Patel replies, "Two cups of coffee and a coke."
  

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• Why did 18 Mr Patel's go to a movie?
  
• Because below 18 was not allowed.
  

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To lose weight the doctor told Mr Patel to run eight kilometres a day for 300 days. After 300 days, Mr Patel called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem.

• "What's the problem?" asked the doctor.
  
• "I'm 2400 Kms from home."
  

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Having lost his donkey Mr Patel got down to his knees and started thanking God.

• A passer-by saw him and asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for?"
  
• Mr Patel replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I wasn't riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too!"
  

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Mr Patel got his 4th child. He fills data in the birth certificate...

• Mother: Hindu.
  
• Father: Hindu.
  
• Kid: Chinese.
  
• "How come you write 'Chinese' when both parents are Hindu?"
  
• "Aah" says Mr Patel, "I read in a newspaper that every 4th person born on the Earth now is Chinese!"
  

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Mr Patel and Mrs Patel landed in Bombay. They managed to get into a double-decker bus.Mr Patel somehow managed to get a bottom seat, but unfortunately Mrs Patel got pushed to the top. After a while when the rush is over, Mr Patel went upstairs to see his wife, Mrs Patel. He met her in a bad condition, clutching the seats in front with both hands, scared to death.

• He says, " What the heck's goin' on? Why are you so scared? I was enjoying my ride down there?"
  
• Scared Mrs Patel replies. "Yeah, but you've got a 'driver!'"
  

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Mr Patel with two red ears went to his doctor.The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered,"I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear."

• "Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief.
  
• "But what happened to your other ear?"
  
• "The bastard called back!"
  

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