LOVE LETTERS TO MY UNBORN CHILD

(nice story) * By Judith Hayes, (compiled by Alice Gray, Stories for a Teen's Heart)

It was a balmy summer day in late July. I had been feeling rather queasy and nauseated, so I decided to see my doctor. "Mrs. Hayes, I'm happy to tell you that you're ten weeks pregnant," my doctor announced. I couldn't believe my ears. It was a dream come true.

My husband and I were young and had been married for only a year. We were working hard to build a happy life together. The news that we were expecting a baby was exciting and scary. In my youthful enthusiasm I decided to write "love letters" to our baby to express my feelings of expectancy and joy. Little did I know just how valuable those love letters would be in years to come.

AUGUST 1971: Oh, my darling baby, can you feel the love I have for you while you are so small and living in the quiet world inside my body? Your daddy and I want the world to be perfect for you with no hate, no wars, no pollution. I can't wait to hold you in my arms in just six months! I love you, and Daddy loves you but he can't feel you yet.

SEPTEMBER 1971: I am four months pregnant and am feeling better. I can tell you are growing, and I hope you are well and comfortable. I've been taking vitamins and eating healthy foods for you. Thank goodness my morning sickness is gone. I think about you all the time.

OCTOBER 1971: Oh, these melancholy moods. I cry so often over so little.
Sometimes I feel very alone, and then I remember you are growing inside of me. I feel you stirring, now tumbling and turning and pushing. It's never the same. Your movements always bring me so much joy.

NOVEMBER 1971: I am feeling much better now that my fatigue and nausea have passed. The intense heat of summer is over. The weather is lovely, crisp, and breezy. I feel your movements often now. Constant punching and kicking. What elation to know you are alive and well. Last week Daddy and I heard your strong heartbeat at the doctor's office.

FEBRUARY 2, I972 at 11:06 P.M.: You were born! We named you Sasha. It was a long, hard twenty-two hour labor, and your daddy helped me relax and stay calm. We are so happy to see you, to hold you, and to greet you. Welcome, our first-born child. We love you so much!

Sasha was soon one-year old and cautiously toddling all over the house. Then she was riding ponies and swinging in the sunshine at the park. Our little blue-eyed beauty entered kindergarten and grew into a bright strong-willed little girl. The years passed so quickly that my husband and I joked that we put our five-year old daughter to bed one night and she woke up the next morning as teenager.

Those few years of adolescence and rebellion were not easy. There were times my beautiful yet angry teenager would dig her feet into the ground and yell, "I hate you! You never loved me! You didn't care about me or want me to be happy!"

Her harsh words cut at my heart. What could have I done wrong? After one of my daughter's outbursts, I suddenly remembered the little box of love letters tucked away in my bedroom closet. I found them and quietly placed them on her bed, hoping she would read them.

A few days later, she appeared before me with tears in her eyes.

"Mom, I never knew just how much you truly loved me -- even before I was born!"
she said. "How could you love me without knowing me? You loved me unconditionally!"

That very precious moment became a bond of unity that still exists between us today. Those dusty old love letters melted away the anger and rebellion she had been feeling.

Mom's Note: "I know you're angry. But don't forget for a second that I love you.
No matter what you do, or say, or think, you can always depend on my support and love." **(JM)

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