joke collection – 28

Funeral Procession

A man was leaving a cafe with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery.
A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind the first. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking his pitbull on a lead.

Behind him was a queue of 200 men walking in a single file. The man couldn't stand the curiosity. He respectfully approached the man walking the dog, "I am sorry for your loss, and I know now is a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this with so many of you walking in a single file.
* Whose funeral is it?"
* The man replied, "Well, that first hearse is for my wife."
* "What happened to her?"
* The man replied, "My pitbull attacked and killed her."
* He inquired further, "Well, who is in the second hearse?"
* The man answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog turned on her." A poignant and thoughtful moment of silence passes between the two men.
* "Can I borrow the Dog?" the inquisitive man asks.
* "Get in line."

PAY BACK
Bernard, who is noted for his gracious manners, was awakened one morning at 3:44 A.M. by his ringing telephone.

* "Your dog's barking, and it's keeping me awake," said an angry voice.
Bernard thanked the caller and politely asked his name and number before hanging up.
The next morning at precisely 3:44 A.M., Bernard called his neighbor back.
* "Good morning, Mr. Williams. ........
Just called to say that I don't have a dog."

Be more concerned with your character than your reputation,
because your character is what you really are,
while your reputation is merely what others think you are
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Indo community